Go away

The appearance of Piers Morgan on my television has created a desperate frame of mind within this nauseated viewer. I am willing to make this one time offer: take back Mr. Morgan, Simon Cowell, and Gordon Ramsay and we will consider re-admitting Madonna. This offer is good only for a twenty-four hour period commencing immediately.

Spoiled For Choice

Scientologist Georgette F. Babbit + Born Again Ted Baxter = Mitt "Corporation ARE people" Romney

Prim, God loving, queer-hatin' Church Lady who made good + Arrow Shirt Model = Michelle Bachmann

Telegenicly over ripe Cormac McCarthy-esque watermelon + inbred hillbilly with delusions of grandeur = Sarah Palin

Bible wavin', sin hatin', apple pie lovin', science doubtin', Morning Talk Show Weathercaster + commedia dell'arte porn actor = Rick Perry

I'd tap that

I want to lick Jake Tapper's



schweddy balls...but don't tell


Dexter Filkins,



he's a jealous man beast. So possessive!